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Signs you have an unhealthy obsession with someone.

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An obsession is when someone or a relationship takes over your life and you are not able to function or do your regular activities.

We know that everyone, when they first fall in love [or start crushing], becomes a little bit obsessed—but if it continues and it begins to take over your life, it’s an obsession

If you think you or a friend may be headed in an unhealthy direction, keep reading to spot the signs of obsession

1. Stalking

To know more about your crush – you check out his/her Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and oh, so many other Social Media apps. You might even talk about him/her to your mutual friends, but once you know enough and you continue doing this – YES, YOU ARE OBSESSING OVER HIM/HER.

2. Always in touch (24/7)

They wouldn’t leave you one bit and would want to chat/talk with you constantly. It’s as easy as whenever you look at your phone, it would either be pinging with their messages or you would be notified with a missed call when you just stepped outside for some fresh air.

3. The Honeymoon Phase Doesn’t Fade Out

Every love story begins with obsession. We just can’t help it! But as time passes by and we begin to find some flaws or have some arguments,

That phase should naturally fade away to some extent. And if it doesn’t, there’s a problem.

4. Using the Crush to Avoid Personal Insecurities

Obsession with a partner comes when we are feeling self-conscious.

 If people are feeling insecure, people are not confident, people have an issue in some part of their life, then this person or this relationship replaces that.

So if I don’t feel good about myself, I use you as a boyfriend to define who I am, to tell me I’m a good person, a pretty person, a smart person. I think oftentimes it’s because we become dependent on others to define us.

5. Excessively jealous

Jealousy is an obsessed person’s best friend. Take it as a warking sign if your partner gets offended or grows jealous for trivial reasons like someone complimenting you or you spending an evening with friends.

Jealousy and insecurity get worse when a person starts acting suspiciously to satisfy his whims and fancy. It’s better to avoid such people

6. ​Emotionally blackmails or threatens you

You should reconsider being with a person who emotionally blackmails or threatens you to be with him because the person knows how he can use your love as a weapon to manipulate you.

In a healthy relationship, no partner must be forced to experience or witness such a bizarre and toxic show of love.

7. Dislikes your plans with your friends

They would want to be included in the plans that you are making with whoever – be it an old school friend, a bunch of office colleagues or just catching up with an acquaintance.

They’d feel left out if such plans materialize and they are left behind to do their own thing.

8. You must reply instantly

In this tech world, they’d constantly be keeping a check on when you are online, and if, you are and if you don’t reply to them immediately it ticks them off.

Whatever the explanation be – receiving documents from your boss, messaging your colleagues, or looking for music to lighten up the mood at work, they won’t understand.

9. Insists on knowing all your passwords

Did you catch your boyfriend/girlfriend reading you and your BFF’s chat? Does your lover insist that you should share all your passwords (including your phone password) with him/her?

This is a sign that you are dating a highly insecure person and insecurity can turn people into obsessive lovers.

10. Don’t get upset, when they should

If you did something that is a big ‘no-no’ in a relationship and your significant other doesn’t get upset with you, then he/she is obsessed with you.

Missing out on a family dinner or not turning up for that movie that you were planning for weeks, just to be a couched potato at home are upsetting matters and they overlook these.

11. Always ready for last-minute plans

f you are the obsessed one, then last-minute plans are always agreed upon with a positive nod and a wide smile on your face.

This can be sometimes used against you. Based on your partner’s free time or availability, plans are made with the understanding that you won’t ever deny.

12. You’re Constantly Obsessing Over Their Happiness

It’s almost like you feel guilty when you’re busy and they call and you can’t do something with them.

You feel responsible for making sure they’re okay and they have something to do and that they have friends.

It’s not empathy, it’s more like feeling responsible totally for who and what they are as well.

So if they call at the last minute, you feel guilty because you’re going out with your friends or you’re constantly thinking about their happiness

If, you can relate to any or all the above-mentioned points, bring your A-game on now. Make sure that you have a keen eye on moves and control the obsession by;

  • See-through your person: If he/she comes across as the obsessive kinds and pushes you to plan outings with his/her friends rather than always planning it with you
  • Trying to keep your insecurities at bay: Let them not crawl in, as that might result in ruining what you have going on right now with your significant other
  • One can’t always be living in the ‘Honeymoon Phase’: So make sure that you don’t end up choosing him/her always over your friends and other commitments. Always is the emphasised word here
  • Introspect and learn: You might be avoiding your insecurities with the recent obsession – either your crush or the significant other
  • Returning texts immediately is not a necessity: If, a busy schedule doesn’t allow you or him/her to return calls or reply to texts immediately, don’t ponder over it and do that the first thing as soon as you get a chance

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The supreme leader of North Korea Kim Jong Un

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Kim Jong-un born 8 January 1983, is a North Korean politician. He has been Supreme Leader of North Korea since 2011. Also the leader of the Workers’ Party of Korea (WPK) since 2012.

He is a son of Kim Jong-il, who was North Korea’s second supreme leader from 1994 to 2011, and Ko Yong-hui.

He is a grandson of Kim Il-sung who was the founder and first supreme leader of North Korea. From its establishment in 1948 until his death in 1994.

First Leader of North Korea

Kim II Sung is the first leader of North Korea to have been born in the country after its founding in 1948.

Kim Jong Un was viewed a successor to the leadership of North Korea from late 2010. Following his father’s death in December 2011, state television announced Kim as the “Great Successor”.

Kim holds the titles of General Secretary of the Workers’ Party of Korea and Chairman of the Central Military Commission. He is the President of the State Affairs Commission.

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Presidium of the Politburo

And also, a member of the Presidium of the Politburo of the Workers’ Party of Korea. The highest decision-making body.

Kim received a promotion to the highest rank of Marshal in the Korean People’s Army in July 2010. Consolidating his position as Supreme Commander of the Armed Forces.

North Korean state media often refer to him as “Marshal Kim Jong-un” or “Dear Respected Leader”.

Policy of Byungjin

He has promoted the policy of byungjin. Similar to Kim Il-sung’s policy from the 1960s, referring to the simultaneous development of both the economy and the country’s nuclear weapons program.

Kim rules North Korea as a totalitarian dictatorship. And his leadership has followed the same cult of personality as his grandfather and father.

A landmark United Nations Human Rights Council report, suggested that Kim be put on trial for crimes against humanity in 2014.

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Execution of North Korean Officials

He has ordered the purge or execution of several North Korean officials. He is believed to have assasinated his half-brother, Kim Jong-nam in 2017.

This was in Malaysia. He has presided over an expansion of the consumer economy, construction projects and tourist attractions.

Kim also expanded North Korea’s nuclear program. Which led to heightened tensions with the United States and South Korea.

Summits with South Korean and US Presidents

In 2018 and 2019, Kim took part in summits with South Korean President Moon Jae-in and US President Donald Trump.

He has claimed success in combatting the COVID-19 pandemic in North Korea Although many experts doubt the country has had no cases altogether.

Second of three children

Kim Jong-un is the second of three children Ko Yong-hui bore to Kim Jong-il. His elder brother Kim Jong-chul was born in 1981.

While his younger sister, Kim Yo-jong, was born in 1987. He is a grandson of Kim Il-sung.

Who was the founder of and led North Korea, from its establishment in 1948 until his death in 1994.

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North Korean Citizen

Kim is the first leader of North Korea, to have been born a North Korean citizen. His father having been born in the Soviet Union, and his grandfather having been born a Japanese subject during the colonial period.

All the children of Kim Jong-il spent their lives in Switzerland. As well as the mother of the two youngest sons, who lived in Geneva for some time.

First reports said that Kim Jong-un attended the private International School of Berne. In Gümligen in Switzerland, under the name “Chol-pak” or “Pak-chol” from 1993 to 1998.

Shy and Good Student

He is shy, a good student who got along well with his classmates, and was a basketball fan.

However, it is later suggested that the student at the Gümligen school, was not Kim Jong-un, but his elder brother Kim Jong-chul.

Kim Jong-un attended the Liebefeld Steinhölzli state school. In Köniz near Bern under the name “Pak-un”.

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1989 – 2000

Or “Un-pak” from 1998 until 2000 as the son of an employee of the North Korean embassy in Bern.

Authorities confirmed that a North Korean student from North Korea attended the school during that period.

Pak-un first attended a special class for foreign-language children and later attended the regular classes of the 6th, 7th, 8th.

Final 9th Year

And part of the final 9th year, leaving the school abruptly in the autumn of 2000. He is a well-integrated and ambitious student and liked to play basketball.

However, his grades and attendance rating were poor. The ambassador of North Korea in Switzerland, Ri Chol, had a close relationship with him and acted as a mentor.

One of Pak-un’s classmates told reporters that he had told him, that he was the son of the leader of North Korea.

Awkward with girls

According to some reports, Kim s described by classmates as a shy child who was awkward with girls.

And indifferent to political issues, but who distinguished himself in sports and had a fascination, with the American National Basketball Association and Michael Jordan.

Lived in Switzerland

In April 2012, new documents came to light indicating that Kim Jong-un had lived in Switzerland. Since 1991 or 1992, earlier than previously thought.

The Laboratory of Anatomic Anthropology at the University of Lyon, France, compared the picture of Pak-un taken at the Liebefeld Steinhölzli school in 1999.

With a picture of Kim Jong-un from 2012 and concluded that the faces show a conformity of 95%. Suggesting that it is most likely that they are the same person.

Washington Post report

The Washington Post reported in 2009, that Kim Jong-un’s school friends, recalled he “spent hours doing meticulous pencil drawings of Chicago Bulls superstar Michael Jordan”.

Obsessed with basketball and computer games, he was a fan of Jackie Chan action movies.

Most analysts agree that Kim Jong-un attended Kim Il-sung University. A leading officer-training school in Pyongyang, from 2002 to 2007.

Two Degrees

Kim obtained two degrees, one in physics at Kim Il-sung University. And another as an Army officer at the Kim Il-sung Military University.

In late February 2018, Reuters reported that Kim and his father, had used forged passport. Supposedly issued by Brazil and dated 26 February 1996.

To apply for visas in various countries. Both 10-year passports carry a stamp saying “Embassy of Brazil in Prague”. Kim Jong-un’s passport records the name “Josef Pwag” and a date of birth of 1 February 1983.

Photo Outside North Korea

Only one confirmed photograph of him is known to exist for many years. Outside North Korea, apparently taken in the mid-1990s, when he was eleven.

Other supposed images of him occasionally surfaced but disputed. It was only in June 2010, shortly before he was given official posts.

And publicly introduced to the North Korean people, that more pictures were released of Kim. Taken when he was attending school in Switzerland.

First Official Image

The first official image of him as an adult, was a group photograph released on 30 September 2010.

The party conference effectively anointed him and in which he is sat in the front row. Two places from his father. Followed by newsreel footage of him attending the conference.

Eldest half – brother

Kim Jong-un’s eldest half-brother, Kim Jong-nam, had been the favorite to succeed. But reportedly fell out of favor after 2001.

When he was caught attempting to enter Japan, on a fake passport to visit Tokyo Disneyland. In 2017, Kim Jong-nam was killed in Malaysia by suspected North Korean agents.

Kim Jong-il’s former personal chef, Kenji Fujimoto, revealed details regarding Kim Jong-un. With whom he had a good relationship.

Fujimoto

Stating that he was favored to be his father’s successor. Fujimoto also said that Jong-un was favored by his father, over his elder brother, Kim Jong-chul.

Reasoning that Jong-chul is too feminine in character. While Jong-un is “exactly like his father”.

Furthermore, Fujimoto stated that “if power is to be handed over, then Jong-un is the best for it. He has superb physical gifts. Is a big drinker and never admits defeat.”

Smokes Yves Saint Laurent Cigarettes

Also, according to Fujimoto, Jong-un smokes Yves Saint Laurent cigarettes. Loves Johnnie Walker whisky and has a Mercedes-Benz 600 luxury sedan.

When Jong-un was 18, Fujimoto described an episode where Jong-un once questioned his lavish lifestyle.

And asked, “we are here, playing basketball, riding horses, riding jet skis, having fun together. But what of the lives of the average people?”

Reports of a successor

On 15 January 2009, the South Korean news agency Yonhap reported that Kim Jong-il had appointed Kim Jong-un to be his successor.

On 8 March 2009, BBC News reported that Kim Jong-un was on the ballot for 2009 elections. To the Supreme People’s Assembly, the rubber stamp parliament of North Korea.

Subsequent reports indicated that his name did not appear on the list of lawmakers.

North Korean Military

In the National Defense Commission, which is a banch of the North Korean military. From 2009, it was understood by foreign diplomatic services that Kim was to succeed his father Kim Jong-il.

As the head of the Korean Workers’ Party and de facto leader of North Korea. He has been named “Yŏngmyŏng-han Tongji” (영명한 동지).

Which loosely translates to “Brilliant Comrade”. His father had also asked embassy staff abroad to pledge loyalty to his son.

Newly Composed Song of Praise

There have also been reports that citizens in North Korea were encouraged to sing a newly composed “song of praise” to Kim Jong-un.

In a similar fashion to that of praise songs relating to Kim Jong-il and Kim Il-sung. Later, in June, Kim was reported to have visited China.

Secretly to “present himself” to the Chinese leadership, who later warned against North Korea conducting another nuclear test. The Chinese foreign ministry has strongly denied that this visit occurred.

September 2009

In September 2009, it was reported that Kim Jong-il had secured support for the succession plan after a propaganda campaign.

It is believed by some that, Kim Jong-un was involved in the Cheonan sinking and the bombardment of Yeonpyeong.

To strengthen his military credentials and facilitate a successful transition of power from his father.

Central Military Commission

Kim Jong-un was made a daejang. The equivalent of a four-star general in the United States, on 27 September 2010.

A day ahead of a rare Workers’ Party of Korea conference in Pyongyang. The first time North Korean media had mentioned him by name.

And despite him having no previous military experience. Despite the promotion, no further details.

September 2010

On 28 September 2010, he was named vice chairman of the Central Military Commission. And appointed to the Central Committee of the Workers’ Party, in an apparent nod to become the successor to Kim Jong-il.

On 10 October 2010, Kim Jong-un was alongside his father, when he attended the ruling Workers’ Party’s 65th-anniversary celebration.

This was seen as confirming his position, as the next leader of the Workers’ Party. Unprecedented international press access was granted to the event.

Importance of Kim Jong Un’s presence

Further indicating the importance of Kim Jong-un’s presence.[57] In January 2011. The regime reportedly began purging around 200 protégés.

Of both Jong-un’s uncle-in-law Jang Song-thaek and O Kuk-ryol, the vice chairman of the National Defence Commission.

By either detention or execution to further prevent either man from rivaling Jong-un.

Read more at https://thebigissue.co.ke

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Famous people who have been charged with sex crimes

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Several famous musicians, actors, and athletes have been charged with sex crimes.

Some of these celebrities were the victims of false allegations, while others were found guilty of rape and molestation.

They have been charged with indecent exposure, as well as a few famous actors. In short, there’s a surprising amount of celebrities accused of sexual assault and other similar crimes.

1. R.Kelly

For more than two decades, chart-topping R&B singer R. Kelly had faced allegations of sexual abuse.

The accounts went back to the start of his career in the 1990s, with many centring on the predatory pursuit of teenage girls.

R. Kelly was charged with statutory rape and child pornography in 2002 after a video surfaced that appeared to show Kelly having sex and urinating on an underage girl. After several delays, Kelly was found not guilty in 2008.

In 2019, Kelly was charged with 10 counts of “aggravated criminal sexual [misconduct]” involving girls between the ages of 13 and 16. Cook County State’s Attorney Kim Foxx urged victims to come forward after a 2018 documentary, Surviving R. Kelly. At least two women reportedly responded. 

In September 2021, R. Kelly was found guilty of racketeering, including acts of bribery and sexual exploitation of a child, along with separate sex trafficking charges.

2. Mike Tyson

Mike Tyson is recognised as one of the greatest fighters of all time. He was a monstrous heavyweight, a world champion and a knockout expert.

But he also had a dark side out of the ring. 

He was convicted of a rape charge in 1992 after sexually assaulting 18-year-old Desiree Washington, who was the reigning Miss Black Rhode Island at the time. Tyson served three years in prison for the crime.

3. Tupac Shakur

Tupac Amaru Shakur was sentenced to one and a half to four and a half years at Clinton Correctional Facility in Dannemora, NY on rape charges.

He was charged with sexual battery and sodomy in 1993.

Shakur then admitted to having consensual sexual relations with the woman who accused him of the assault and was convicted of first-degree sexual abuse.

4. Britney Spears

In 2012, Britney Spears was accused of sexual harassment by former body guard, Fernando Flores.

He claimed the pop star flashed him and invited him into her bedroom while she was nude.

Fernando Flores then accused the singer of repeatedly parading around in the nude and having sex in front of him.

5. Kobe Bryant

NBA player Kobe Bryant was accused of rape in 2003. He was accused of raping a 19-year-old Colorado hotel concierge when he was 24.

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 The charges were eventually dropped in 2004, but Bryant did admit to having consensual sex with a woman who was not his wife.

6. Kyle Massey

Former Disney Channel star Kyle Massey was charged with a felony in June 2021 for allegedly sending pornographic photos to a 13-year-old girl.

This is tied to his 2019 civil lawsuit, in which the child in question is sued him for $1.5 million for allegedly sending “numerous sexually explicit text messages, images, and videos” via Snapchat.

7. Bill Cosby

In 2004, Bill Cosby was accused of sexual misconduct by 13 different women. The civil lawsuit claimed he drugged and sexually assaulted the women. Cosby settled with undisclosed terms.

In April 2018, Cosby was tried for the 2004 rape of a woman named Andrea Constand. He was found guilty of three counts of aggravated indecent assault and faces up to 10 years in prison. 

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DR Congo worst dictator who served for 32 uninterrupted years!

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Mobutu Sese Seko Kuku Ngbendu Wa Za Banga, born Joseph-Désiré Mobutu in the DR Congo; 14 October 1930 – 7 September 1997) is a Congolese politician.

Also a military officer and the President of the Democratic Republic of the Congo from 1965 to 1971, and Zaire from 1971 to 1997. He served as Chairman of the Organization of African Unity from 1967 to 1968.

In the Congo Crisis, Mobutu, as Chief of Staff of the Army and with support from Belgium and the United States, deposed the democratically elected government.

Patrice Lumumba

Headed by left-wing nationalist, Patrice Lumumba in 1960. Mobutu installed a government, executing Lumumba in 1961.

The executor government lead the country’s armed forces until he took power directly in a second coup in 1965.

To consolidate his power, he established the Popular Movement of the Revolution as the sole legal political party in 1967.

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Change of Congo’s name to Zaire

He also changed the Congo’s name to Zaire in 1971, and his own name to Mobutu Sese Seko in 1972.

Mobutu claimed his political ideology is “neither left nor right, nor even centre”. Though nevertheless he developed a regime intensely autocratic, even by African standards of his time.

He made attempts to purge the country of all colonial cultural influence through his program of “national authenticity”.

Cult of a personality

Mobutu is the object of a pervasive cult of personality. In his rule, he amassed a large personal fortune through economic exploitation and corruption.

This led some to call his rule a “kleptocracy”. He presided over a period of widespread human rights violations.

Under his rule, the nation experienced uncontrolled inflation, a large debt, and massive currency devaluations.

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The US, France and Beligium

Mobutu received strong support (military, diplomatic and economic). This came from the United States, France, and Belgium.

Who believed he is a strong opponent of communism in Francophone Africa. He did build close ties with the governments of apartheid South Africa, Israel and the Greek military junta.

From 1972 onward, he secured support from Mao Zedong of China, mainly due to his anti-Soviet stance.

Afro Asians Nations

The dictatorial Congo was favored by the Chinese leader as part of Mao’s attempts to create a bloc of Afro-Asian nations led by him.

The massive Chinese economic aid that flowing into Zaire gave Mobutu more flexibility in his dealings with Western governments.

It allowed him to identify as an “anti-capitalist revolutionary”, and enabled him to avoid going to the International Monetary Fund for assistance.

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Economic Deterioration

By 1990, economic deterioration and unrest led Mobutu to agree to share power with opposition leaders.

But he used the army to thwart change until May 1997, when rebel forces led by Laurent-Désiré Kabila overran the country. And forced him into exile.

Already suffering from advanced prostate cancer, he died three months later in Morocco. Mobutu was notorious for corruption, nepotism, and the embezzlement.

Amounts Involved in Corruption

Mobutu embezzled between US$4 billion and $15 billion during his rule and known for extravagances such as shopping trips to Paris via the supersonic and expensive Concorde.

Read more at https://thebigissue.co.ke

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